Goldmind's Unwind

IT'S A TOUGH JOB BUT SOMEBODY’S GOTTA SCREW IT UP



Good Afternoon sir can I get a drink started for you.

Uh, yeah...I’ll have a venti car’mel low fat no whip cappuccino

VENTI CAR’MEL LOW FLAT NO LIP CRAPPUCINO!

No, that’s a venti car’mel low fat no whip cappuccino.

Yeah I know, VERY HARMFUL LOW FLAT NO CRAP LIPPUCINO! Next guest in line!

I’d like a tall soy car’mel macchiatto.

SALT TOY MARBLE SACCHIATTO! Next visitor in line please!

Wait, that wasn’t right I wanted a—

NEXT VISITOR!

It’s my turn pal! Yeah, gimme like a venti iced blended maple frappuccino

VINTAGE ICE DENTED MENTAL AL PACINO and your name sir?

Hey I didn’t order that, you said ‘vintage ice—

FOR VINNIE!

Nuh-uh my name ain’t Vinnie, It’s Paul!

MAKE THAT A TALL!

No, look mack I oughta fatten your lip
AND VINNIE ALSO WANTS A NO LOOK MACCHIATTO, LOW FAT NO WHIP!

Forget this place! C’mon Carmella!

Next family member!

Hi! I’d like a venti iced mocha frappuccino with light whip, and my name is Wanda.

WENDY DICED OKRA CLAPPUCCINO WITH NICE TITS AND WHY BLAME UGANDA

Next contestant in line!

Just a tall soy mocha frappuccino with no whip.

TOLSTOY VOCAL PALOMINO WITH GOAT LIPS! Next sacrificial virgin in line.

I’ll have a tall low fat blended acåi sorbetto.

HOLOGRAPH RENDERED SPY GUIPETTO! Next prisoner!

Yeah hey, howzit goin’ dude. (Listen dude, I gotta call you back I gotta figure out what I’m gonna order... Yeah, I love you too, dude... uh-huh, take care now bro, bye-bye)
Sorry about that dude. I was talkin on...

We know, there’s a line of people behind you.

Woah! Yer right, okay, what do I want... hmm... what do you recommend?

A black eye, two shots of espresso in a cup of drip coffee.

Awesome! gimme a black eye.

KAPOW! (flubump)

Next victim!

Hi, I’ll get the pumpkin spice low fat muffin and a tall decaffienated with a dollop of foam.

HEY AL, GET THIS PUNK A NICE BIG FAT NOTHIN‘ AND CALL ME A CAB, IT‘S LATE AND I GOTTA GO HOME!