Tuesday, November 6, 2007

30 Worst Things to Stuff Inside Your Thanksgiving Turkey

List concocted/assembled by Cheddar, Goldmind, Guinness & numbsain

30. Bole weevil ala mode
29. Alpo
28. Toenail Clippings
27. What the turkey already had inside
26. Spam
25. Graves and Corpsed Taters
24. Ex Lax Pudding
23. Agent Orange
22. A smaller turkey, a chicken, a cornish game hen, a grouse, a sparrow, a hummingbird, a cricket, an ant, an aphid, an amoeba
21. Tang Concentrate
20. Broken Glass
19. Silly String
18. Purina Cat Chow
17. Gravel
16. Mashed Turnips and Harlots
15. DDT soaked Peat Moss
14. Criminal Evidence
13. Pickled Ram Testicles
12. Caterpiller Fungus
11. Clay
10. Duck fetus
9. Hallucinagenic Mushrooms
8. Packing noodles
7. E-coli flavored botchulism
6. Stuff beneath your couch cushions
5. Jimmy Hoffa
4. Head Cheese
3. Bull Penis
2. Chipmunk Vomit
1. Your Cat