Tyler’s Dad was Wealthy
Tyler's dad was wealthy,
Got it from grand dad,
He'd spend his cash on whores and hash to stop from feeling sad.
Tyler's dad was wealthy,
"I'm rich" he sadly sighed.
He could not hide the pain inside so slit his wrist and died.
Chiggadee boop and bee
Chiggadee boop, Chigadee bee,
Oh No! Did the baby pee?
Chiggadee bop, Chigadee ben,
If you want your face slapped, do it again.
The Pirate Boy
Timmy was a pirate
Sailed the sea
He liked to take his cream with tea
Then one day
He said “I’m gay.”
That’s why his crewmen walk that way
Have you a rhyme?
Have you any rhymes to ease my pain?
"Yes I’m a doctor, you may be insane!"
Have you any pills, to help with depression?
"Yes mam, Yes mam. Come to my session!"
Have you any rope, if I run out of hope?
"Just a bit of floss mam, you’d better cope!"
Have you a life, you’d care to say?
"Not really mam, that’s why I blog each day."
Clap, Clap
Clap, clap
see the baby rap
Chill, Chill
See the baby kill
Rad, rad
now the baby sad
Bye bye
see the baby die
Dung and Stink Poo
Dung and stink poo
Fell from a yew
Rolled down a hill till it ran into Sue
Sue got hurt
Called out to Burt
Who laughed until Sue filled his mouth up with dirt
Jabby Jo
Jo Jo Jabby Jo, Jabby Wabba Jee,
Can you show me where, a little boy can pee?
Jo Jo Jabby Jee, Jabba Wabba Jo,
Piss off kid, I just don’t know.
Snot, snot
Snot snot
Blow it in a pot
Stick it in the oven
And drink it hot.
Pretty Pete
Pretty Pete
Liked to cheat
He chased a dog who was in heat
Caught her in a ditch
Here’s the hitch
Out came Pete with a baby bitch.
Waaaaaaaah!
Drew Drew Dragon
Drew drew dragons
Drew drew good
Drew drew his daddy’s ire
Now Drew chews food with wood
Jack Need Help
Jack Sprat was a borderline, his wife was a narcissist
They jumped off a bridge together, now rarely are they missed.
The Honest Parrot
Oh Polly Bird, have you a word, for an old woman earnest and true?
"Perhaps I would mam, if I gave just a damn, but frankly I want to kill you."
Uncle Sam, Uncle Sam
Uncle Sam, Uncle Sam, make you wise decisions?
"Oh yes, the interest groups will see to that precision."
Uncle Sam, Uncle Sam, will peace you spread afar?
"Of course I will my little child, if gas stays in my car."
Uncle Sam, Uncle Sam, will the earth live life as one?
"That is my goal - we'll save their soul, that's why I use my gun."
Uncle Sam, Uncle Sam, do you love our globe?
"My loyal subjects all I love, now bow before my robe."
Dog and Hog
There once was a dog and a flatulent hog
They coughed, belched and farted, and called it a blog
The blog was a fad
Which wasn’t so bad
Now doggie and hoggie are slightly less sad.
~Goldmind
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Mother Goosed
