Archeologists Discover Recording of Psychiatrists Performing Rap Concert

Editor's note: The following is a startling transcription of a recently discovered phonographic recording of psychoanalysts Sigmund Freud and Carl Jung engaging in what appears to be the first "rap" ever recorded.

Now Si-gi-Sig-mund Freud that is the name I use
I said I come from a line a' bril-liant Jews
So don't be mes-sin' with me. So don't be raisin' the Reich.
'Cause I am the def psych doc who repair ya Mic.

Now twenty years ago, you know my Uncle Fred
Well now he snuck all up, into ma' ver-y bed
And just what happened there, ya' know I cannot say,
But it affect ma' view right to this very day.

So now my protégée, you know he ain't so dumb
da brotha go by the name o' DJ Jung.
So Jung an-a-lyze, So Jung take the mic,
Jung diagnose them brothers now with all your might.

My name is Jung! I got the lung!
So y'all sit back and listen to ma’ crafty tongue.
I'm gonna break ya down, transfer it right
Gonna blind you all, wit' psy-chi-a-tric light

Yo syn-chro-nic-ity…yo ancient ar-che-type…
I'll make sucka-PhDs-grab-fo-their-baby-wipes
Collective con-scious-ness…project ma’ thoughts all night
Super-ego, Id…I conquer ever’ fright

Well NOW ya know, what cha deal-in' with
So take our rap to heart or you become a myth
And take two of these, because you are a wreck
Freud and Jung are done…here's your

check…check…check

~Goldmind, numbsain