For centuries the conflict has raged. Even in peaceful interludes, there remains a subtle undercurrent of social unrest and political upheaval. Thanks to the recently established Miao Lin Temple and Martial Arts Training Facility, the balance of power in the age-old conflict between cats and dogs may at last have shifted.In an exclusive interview, Defense Secretary Cuddles stated: “Yes, it may be true that we finally have the edge. The canines have always been bigger. They have always been able to generate more explosive bowel movements. But their days are numbered. Why? Winged dragon drool kick chop chop. It's a clandestine technique so powerful; so utterly lethal; that focus group lab rats have chewed off their own faces rather than endure it. This technique is so fast and so deadly, we are able to actually kick the snot out of dogs and that is proving to be the decisive in the war between our species."
To preempt potential political retribution, Coco Smoke, spokescat for the Feline Party, released a statement announcing that cats have recently made great strides in their receipt of human attention, love, and approval. "Favorite pet" numbers, though still favoring canines, presently tally as follows:
Owner prefers following type pet:
Dog............... 48% (down 7% from prior fiscal tax year)
Cat.................43% (up 28%)
Hamster.........5.6%
Bird................4.4%
Pygmy Marmoset......... -1%
Other...........naught
~numbsain, Goldmind
