Friday, January 25, 2008

Then and Now. A Pictoral Comparison

It is a topic that's been visited many times on email and web page, but it never gets old. Truly seeing how far we've come (both in terms of progression and decide which is which) in our respective life times. So here is our own version of then and now. The then is the decade of this author's birth, the 1970s. The now is whenever the hell I want it to be. So there. You're in my world now.

Everyone remembers this classic, even if it is a bit vague in the pic. It's "Pong", the first video game ever designed for public consumption. It would provide easily 30 minutes of fun as you pounded on dad, shutting him out 8-0 while he mumbled about "new fangled gizmos" in frustrated consternation.

Providing high quality graphics, animated combat, and seductively dancing elven women, the world of warcraft is home to over 10 million players world wide. It gives more than 12 hours of fun every day to the casual player who no longer sees his parents, friends, the dinner table, or the shower. Also provides economy boost to China and Korea as foreign "gold farmers" work round the clock to sell players currency that is licensed by "Blizzard." Sure it's theft. But it's fun!

Look at the sleek frame. The athletic build. The upholstered head. The 70s body was a work of art. Still subsisting for the most part on home cooked meals, marijuana, and hardcore disco nights, the 1970s tummy was taut, smooth, and perfect to snort a line off of. And the 70s ass wasn't bad either.

Hello fast food Era! Hello sitting in front of the TV watching American Idol every day era! Hello redhead on the right in the pink bathing suit....rooowwwrr...ahem! This is the modern day body. "Curvy". "Voluptuous." "Athletically challenged." "Obese." "Fatty fat fat." Could there be a correlation between this body and the above "World of Warcraft" insert? I don't know and I'm too busy photo shopping the bikinis off of these women to care.

Recreational entertainment? The lawn Jart. Come on, who could forget the family togetherness? The competition? The aiming for Uncle Frank when he was inebriated because he wouldn't remember anyway? Millions of Americans got hours of joy and not a few hospital bills from this family pass time.

Entertainment? Recreational teenage pregnancy. Come on! Leading the way for the erosion of common sense and morals in the country, the Spears family is an easy target of my withering sarcasm. But seriously. You have a tv show. Your sister is already a disaster. You're well on your way to your first million. Keep your legs closed!!!!! But to be fair, it's not just you. Say hello to planned parenthood, free clinics, and halls of shame all across America these days. It used to be the birth rate would would double 9 months after a power outage. Now it doubles 9 months after a Hannah Montana concert. Stop it kids! Go play World of Warcraft!

Ahhh 70s fashion. The bright colors, the bell bottoms, the afro, the mercedes medallion. Every Saturday night was like a rainbow as wave after wave caught that saturday night fever. Never in all of history were fashion trends so affected by alcohol, narcotics, and hideous taste.

Until Now.